


e g g is typing...

by KiwiKat_Writes



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types
Genre: (it's used for irony), (very light on that yandere tag), Alternate Universe - Non-Despair (Dangan Ronpa), Aromantic Leon Kuwata, Asahina Aoi And Naegi Makoto Are Siblings, Bad Romance Help, Breaking The 4th Wall, Byakuya stop being a butt challenge, Cheating, DING DONG BING BONG GROUP CHAT FIC, Enoshima Junko has DID, Frontotemporal Dementia, Gen, Hifumi Edition, It makes sense, Kazuichi is Bad at Emotions, Les Misérables References, Makoto does Track, Makoto is pure, Mentioned Medical Malpractice, Mentioned bullying, Meta, Multi, Non-Despair Enoshima Junko, Yandere, boop de boop here we go, hinata is a mess, hoo boi dr2, it happened, like he puts it together, listen i wanted this boi to run, looks like Hina, makoto's mom, mentioned misgendering, no beta we die like komaeda, soft ahoge makoto, that mikan/akane/junko is a complete crackship, this does not look good does it, this is an important headcanon of mine ok, trans makoto naegi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-30
Updated: 2020-10-17
Packaged: 2021-03-06 03:55:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 6,770
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25616971
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KiwiKat_Writes/pseuds/KiwiKat_Writes
Relationships: Asahina Aoi/Ogami Sakura, Enoshima Junko/Maizono Sayaka, Fujisaki Chihiro/Celestia Ludenberg, Hagakure Yasuhiro/no one lol, Hinata Hajime/Komaeda Nagito, Ikusaba Mukuro/Kirigiri Kyoko, Ishimaru Kiyotaka/Naegi Makoto/Oowada Mondo, Soda Kazuichi/Komaeda Nagito (one-sided), Sonia Nevermind/Tanaka Gundham, Tsumiki Mikan/Owari Akane/Enoshima Junko
Comments: 29
Kudos: 122





	1. Chapter 1

**_Hopes Peak’s Mistake Class_ **

e g g: guys??? i have an Important Question

blooberry: what is it child

Byakuya Togami: Someone as weak and naive as you has a question? Unbelievable

e g g:

e g g: You call me child, you call me weak, you call me naive, but I am a goddess. My blood is made of stardust, my heart of burning flame. I have the strength of a warrior, and the mind of a wise man. You thought you could lock me in your grasp, but my sword is sharp and your grip loose, and this is how I become your queen.

Celestial Seasonings:

Celestial Seasonings: I’m stealing that Miku

e g g: go ahead!

Encyclopedia Brown: Anyways, Miku, what is your question?

blooberry: I feel oddly patronized by that

Byakuya Togami: ...you dare speak against me

e g g: You know, Byakuya, just yesterday you wanted to debate with me

e g g: If you’re gonna be this two-faced at least make one of them pretty

Lady Gaga: KWDNAKGFNDSKJGDFNKJL

Lady Gaga: IM SO PROUD OF YOU MIKU

durnut: OH NY GOSH

durnut: @Jacki Chan BABE MIKU ROASTED TOGAMI IM SO PROUD OF HER

Jacki Chan: The student has become a master *wipes tear*

Gremlin: how does it still surprise me that Sakura is one of the biggest memelords here

Gremlin: BUT MIKU OG MY GOSH IM SO PORIUD

Insane Gemstone: whatever the **** you tried to do with that last word failed

Insane Gemstone: Not ****ing bad, chick

Only Invalid Fanfiction Writer: Good job, Master Naegi

Gremlin:

**_Gremlin has kicked Only Invalid Fanfiction Writer_ **

Gremlin: WHO ADDED HIM BACK ON

durnut: I don’t even remember what my nickname means

Psychic: *gasp*

Psychic: How Dare You Not Know Of Get Good Gaming And Their  _ L e g e n d a r y V i d e o s _

durnut: 

durnut: can someone else explain-

e g g: ! guys!

e g g: I have a serious question!

blooberry: Shoot hun!   


e g g: so,,,, theoretically, how does one feel when one feels dysphoria or like,,,, their body shouldn’t be theirs?

e g g: asking for a friend

Gremlin: !

Gremlin: It’s honestly p simple

Gremlin: Dysphoria is kind of like those Halloween morph suits but it’s too tight, super itchy, and you can’t take it off bc it’s your actual skin

durnut: That is an interesting combination of words

e g g: ...thank you

e g g: Also, for now, could you guys just call me Naegi? I have to think abt something

Psychic: of course, Naegi!

e g g: ty!!!!

**_e g g has gone offline_ **

blooberry: 

Insane Diamond: ,,,,so who’s gonna tell them that we know that they don’t really have friends out of our class

Lady Gaga: I mean 

Lady Gaga: They think they’re hiding it well 

Encyclopedia Brown: It’s honestly kind of sad

Encyclopedia Brown: The other classes look down on them for getting in on luck, and they don’t take the time to really get to know them, so they just hate from afar (and sometimes bully) without making any sort of judgement by themselves

Lady Gaga: that’s just wrong >:(

blooberry: Do you think they’re feeling dysphoria?

Bucky Barnes: I mean who else do they know that feels dysphoria

Bucky Barnes: *that is their friend

Jacki Chan: ….should I beat up some bullies

durnut: let me join and sure :)

Jacki Chan: ofc babe

blooberry: Something tells me what the topic of my next song will be about

Celestial Seasonings: Of course, if you would like a cameo I’d be glad to sing with you

blooberry: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

11037: seriously what is my nickname

Only Invalid Fanfiction Writer: my time has come

Gremlin: WT*

**_Only Invalid Fanfiction Writer has changed blooberry’s name to stabbity stoob_ **

**_Only Invalid Fanfiction Writer has changed Gremlin’s name to Bloodlust_ **

**_Only Invalid Fanfiction Writer has changed Insane Gemstone’s name to CountryCrock_ **

**_Only Invalid Fanfiction Writer has changed Kiyotaka Ishimari’s name to B O N K_ **

**_Only Invalid Fanfiction Writer has changed Celestial Seasonings’ name to Eliza Hamilton’s Love Letters_ **

**_Only Invalid Fanfiction Writer has changed Bucky Barnes’ name to speared then stabbed_ **

**_Only Invalid Fanfiction Writer has changed e g g’s name to *falls down 40-foot garbage chute* hey ron_ **

Eliza Hamilton’s Love Letters: 

Eliza Hamilton’s Love Letters: i hate you so much Hifumi

CountryCrock: what the absolute ****

Bloodlust: N O P E

**_Bloodlust has banned Only Invalid Fanfiction Writer_ **

Encyclopedia Brown: am I the only one worried abt Naegi’s new nickname

stabbity stoob:  _ i think we have other problems here _

**_Bloodlust has changed Bloodlust’s name to Gremlin_ **

**_Gremlin has restored nicknames from: 5 minutes ago_ **

Celestial Seasonings: oh thank goodness

blooberry: Chihiro I owe you a copy of our next album for free

Gremlin: !!!!!!

Lady Gaga: exsquEEZE MOI

blooberry: no

blooberry: you have to earn it

Lady Gaga: 

Lady Gaga: fair

11037: that didn’t answer my question

Gremlin: It’s a meta explanation

11037: ah

11037: no need to explain anymore

Celestial Seasonings: anyways

Celestial Seasonings: what do we do about the people bullying Naegi

durnut: after Closely Inspecting The Rules

durnut: we can’t do anything until Naegi admits it, or one of us sees them getting physically bullied

blooberry: 

blooberry: exsqueeze me what

Jacki Chan:

Jacki Chan: n o

Insane Gemstone: do I need to get the Crazy Diamonds involved bc I will

Encyclopedia Brown: That’s a bad idea Mondo

Encyclopedia Brown: That’s a b a d i d e a

Bucky Barnes: I have an idea

Bucky Barnes: I stalk Naegi until I see someone physically bully them

Bucky Barnes: Then I can step in and  _ boom _ EVIDENCE

blooberry: GUYS NAEGI’S GETTING ON RN FLOOD THE CHAT WITH E

blooberry: E

blooberry: E

blooberry: E

blooberry: E

Encyclopedia Brown: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

**_e g g is online_ **

e g g: whoah are yall spamming random letters again????

e g g: anyways! I have an announcement!

e g g: 1st, can yall call me Makoto instead of Miku?

e g g: 2nd, I think I’m a male

e g g: b4 you ask I’ve thought about this for like a month and I’m 99% sure

blooberry: EEEEEEEEEE MAKOTO IM SO PROUD OF YOU

e g g: oh gosh I actually have people that support me-

Jacki Chan: 

Jacki Chan: what does that mean

e g g: hhhhhh I came out to my mom and?? she’s like ‘ok sweetie :)))) tell me when you don’t feel like a boy anymore :))))))) i never wanted a son but ok have fun :)))))’

Jacki Chan:

durnut: Can I Beat Up Your Mom

e g g: whY

e g g: I mean she did have an affair on my dad so

blooberry: WOAH WAIT WHAT

Lady Gaga: T E A

e g g: Oh turns out my mom had an affair on her husband w someone and they had a boy, but she dumped the boy on the other dude to care for, so they divorced and left a girl behind, and then she had my little sis and I

e g g: My dad loves her a ton so he doesn’t want to divorce her, even with her literally bringing another male into the house every so often

durnut: ,,,,wait

durnut: wait is your mom’s name Kibo?

e g g: ?? yeh y???

durnut: omgoodness

durnut: that was my mom’s name before she divorced Pops

e g g: 

e g g: wait what

durnut: omgosh are we half-siblings

e g g: wait let me ask real quick

Lady Gaga: THE TEA IS PIPING HOT

e g g: omgosh I asked her what her first daughter’s name was and she said it was ‘Aoi Ashanina or smth like that i dont really remember’

durnut: ohmyGOSH

durnut: WAIT WAIT A SEC 

blooberry: *crunches popcorn*

durnut: DO I HAVE ANOTHER BROTHER TO SPOIL

e g g: IDK I THINK WE MIGHT BE BROTHER/SISTER

durnut: HOL UP

durnut: MAKOTO COME OVER TO MY HOUSE TODAY AFTER SCHOOL

e g g: OK OK I CAN DO THAT 

e g g: UUUUUHHH IDK HOW TO HANDLE THIS I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO DO

durnut: IM FLOUNDERING TOO WHAT THE HECK

Jacki Chan: omw Aoi

Kiyotaka Ishimaru: Do not fear Makoto, I’m coming to stabilize you in this confusing time!

Insane Gemstones: tch wait for me

e g g: !!!!! yall are so sweet ty sm!

  
  
  


**_secret chat_ **

Leggo my Eggo: are you guys okay with me being,,, y’know, a guy?

Die-monds: babe ofc why ****ing wouldn’t we

Ruler: Does it change anything? We just dont have a female in our relationship anymore

Ruler: We love you so much, Makoto, your being male will not change that!

Die-monds: Listen the **** up Makoto, I’m not one to be mushy but I love you so ****ing much that it would probably transcend dimensions

Die-monds: like I could have no memories of Hope’s Peak and none of you, but I’d still probably love you on sight

Die-monds: that’s how much I love you

Ruler: !!! same hat!!!

Leggo my Eggo: !!!!   


Leggo my Eggo: yall im Sobbing thank you sm

Ruler: we’ll be right there love!

Die-monds: give us 3 mins tops

  
  


**_Unnamed Chat_ **

Aoi Asahina: Makoto, are you at the front gate yet?

Miku Naegi: !

Miku Naegi: On one hand I hate this app rn

Miku Naegi: On the other akmfs I fell asleep sorry I’m s p r i n t i n g!

Aoi Asahina: oh my gosh is that brown blur you

Aoi Asahina: You should try out for track you’d win so many medals

Miku Naegi: maybe? idk that could be fun

Aoi Asahina: Y O YOU'D BE SUCH A GOOD TRACK STAR

Aoi Asahina: I WOULD BE AT E V E R Y MEET

  
  
  


**_Asahina Chat_ **

swimswan: Dad I has q u e s t i o n

Black Cat: yes Aoi??

swimswan: Do u remember my half-sister from Kibo???

Black Cat: why is Miku important here??

swimswan: hhhhhhhhhh ok I’m bringing a friend over

swimswan: Pay attention to his hair and eye color

Black Cat: ???? okay?????

swimswan: also he’s trans but doesn’t have a binder

Black Cat: okay 

  
  
  


**_Asahina Chat_ **

ladder: Aoi why is my husband sobbing while hugging this child

swimswan: oh did he ever tell u abt his divorce?

ladder: ??? yee, she cheated on him and bolted when he confronted her on it

ladder: 5 years into the kid’s life I believe??

ladder: oh

ladder:  _ oh _

swimswan: ye a h

ladder: that’s amazing!

swimswan: Yeah he’s trans so he/him but!!!! it’s my half-brother!

ladder: I’m so happy for you guys!

ladder: also I hope he comes over more bc I want to spoil him already

swimswan: oh believe me I want him to come over more too

  
  
  


**_Hopes Peak’s Mistake Class_ **

e g g: OK TURNS OUT ME AND HINA ARE HALF-SIBLINGS

blooberry: OH MY ABSOLUTE GOSH

Insane Gemstones: That’s ****ing crazy

durnut: OK OK AS HIS SISTER™ I HAVE TO DO THIS

durnut: @Insane Gemstones @Kiyotaka Ishimaru GET OVER TO MY DORM ROOM WE HAVE TO TALK

  
  
  


**_secret chat_ **

Ruler: HINA IS GIVING US THE SHOVEL TALK

Leggo my Eggo: PFFT

Die-monds: Hina: Ok I know you both have a crush on my brother-

Leggo my Eggo: P F F T

Ruler: SHE’S CURRENTLY DESCRIBING EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENS IN A VASECTOMY SAVE US

Leggo my Eggo: sorry hun I can’t do that

Leggo my Eggo: trying out for track rn!

Die-monds: that’s epic!

Leggo my Eggo: !!!! thanksgottago!

Ruler: !!!!! thanksustoo!

  
  
  


~~~~~~~~1 week timeskip~~~~~~~~

  
  
  


**_Hopes Peak’s Mistake Class_ **

e g g: KRWDSNGRDFSKDNC GUYS I GOT ONTO THE TRACK TEAM

durnut: !!!!!!!!!!! GOOD JOB OMGOSH

Kiyotaka Ishimari: Congratulations, Makoto!

blooberry: THATS AMAZING MAKOTO!!!! IM SO PROUD OF YOU

blooberry: After school meet me at that cafe @everyone, we need to celebrate!

Jacki Chan: Makoto, we have something to congratulate you with when you get there

e g g: omgosh

e g g: i’m sobbing thank you all so much

Jacki Chan: can confirm he is crying in class rn

  
  
  


**_Unnamed Chat_ **

Celeste Ludenberg: I have the gift in my backpack

Sakura Oogami: g r e a t

Aoi Asahina: Now we’re gonna have to b careful when calling him he/him around his mom (if we ever meet her)

Aoi Asahina: She doesn’t exactly support it

Sayaka Maizono: I still want to punch her

Mondo Oowada: Get in ****ing line chick

Toko Fukawa: d-does anyone have M-Makoto’s favorite drink?

Kiyotaka Ishimaru: He likes the Mocha Brownie Blast!

Celeste Ludenberg: Figures, someone as sweet as him gets a drink with an overdose of sugar

Mukuro Ikusaba: Are we inviting Hifumi to this?

Kyoko Kirigiri:

Kyoko Kirigiri: no

Mukuro Ikusaba: fair

Kyoko Kirigiri: Remember, we need someone to film the moment he sees what we got him 

Kyoko Kirigiri: It’s most likely going to be completely adorably and slightly tear jerking

Celeste Ludenberg: I can film

Aoi Asahina: this is gonna be e p i c

  
  
  


Makoto raked a hand through his freshly-cut hair as he wandered down the sidewalk, absentmindedly feeling at the spiky strands as he walked. He had snuck out of his house about two hours earlier than normal, taking a train and three months’ allowance to a nearby hair salon and asking to get it cut.

It felt a lot softer and nicer now, not weighing down as heavily as it had anymore. It also helped that the haircutter, a soft friendly-looking foreign woman named Katalina, took one look at him and asked what he identified as, and if his parents supported him. He supposed she just knew, and he explained that he’d transitioned a week ago but wasn’t allowed to get his hair cut. She hummed in sympathy and sat him down in the chair, snipping away. She’d only taken pay for half the normal price, waving any protests away with a bright smile and a ‘glad I could help you with this!’. It had been… nice.

Now all he needed was a binder…

It didn’t help that his mother would open every Amazon package first, and if it was something she didn’t like she would toss it. He ordered a compression shirt a little before he'd put his identity together, and after some research she tossed it into the apartment dumpster. Any bandages that weren’t Band-Aids were also thrown out. He settled for wearing tight sports bras, but it just wasn’t right. It didn’t feel right. 

Anyways, cat cafe!

The little bell ding-a-linged on top of the door as he pushed it open, and almost instantly there was a bright  _ mrrp _ and a weight on his shoulder.

“Oh- Hi, Sweetpea!” One of the workers, a plump teen with mahogany hair and glasses that he recognized as Abigail, chuckled as she passed.

“Hey, Makoto! Your friends are in the back, they’ve ordered already.” He nodded and waved to her as he walked a little further in, to the lump of bean bags that his class always hogged. On the way, Marlowe rubbed against his legs and started following him, and Makoto took a second to mourn his legs. Marlowe was probably the fattest cat at the cafe, and he loved to sit on Makoto’s thighs and purr away. The ginger and white cat’s tail shivered as Makoto reached down and stroked his back, a high-pitched baby meow coming from him. Sweetpea kneaded at his jacket hood, draping herself across the back of his neck. 

“Ey, Makoto!” Yasuhiro waved him over, the other members of Class 78 casually sprawled across the bean bags. Kyoko and Mukuro shared a bean bag, Mukuro blushing slightly on Kyoko’s lap. Celeste was regally propped up on a royal purple bag, hand clandestinely clasped with Chihiro’s on the next bag over. Chihiro’s other hand was busy with Spooky, who was kneading at his skirt softly. Leon was chilling with a fat white cat named Tubbs on his lap, and Byakuya was grumping about Mocha shedding on his expensive pants. Toko, nearby, was occupied with Peaches and Sunny cuddling together on her lap. Pumpkin was cozying up to Sakura, who was cuddling with Hina, who was cuddling Callie. Junko was chattering with Sayaka, with Apricot and Ganache sprawled between them. Kiyotaka and Mondo were sitting together, with Kiyotaka cooing over Dottie and Mondo resolutely ignoring Spud butting against his arm. Makoto settled on an olive bean bag, sending a longing look at Mondo and Kiyotaka. They were keeping their relationship secret for now, but it still kind of hurt. He wanted to cuddle his boyfriends with cats, gosh dangit!

“Hey, Makoto, here’s a drink!” Kiyotaka passed it to Chihiro, who passed it to him. He took a deep sip as Marlowe settled onto his lap, enjoying the rush of sugar and flavor it attacked him with. Sighing in contentment, he relaxed into his bean bag. Marlowe purred at him, kneading his jeans with rose-thorn claws.

“Okay, Makoto, we actually have something for you! This is a congratulations for getting onto the track team, and something that we wanted to get you!” Celeste was filming? but she tossed him a bag that was stapled at the top.

“Woah- guys, you really didn’t have to!” Sayaka groaned, slapping her knee.

“Uh, yeah, but we wanted to! Come on, open it!” Makoto nervously chuckled, taking another sip of his drink before putting it down and ripping the bag open. A soft, olive green lump of fabric tumbled out onto Marlowe, and he  _ mrrp _ ed in surprise. He ran a hand down Marlowe’s back to appease him, before picking up the fabric. Shaking it out, it quickly took the shape of… almost like a sports bra? 

His eyes widened as he realized just what it was. 

Almost against his will, he teared up. Ducking his head, he buried it in the soft fabric of the-  _ his _ binder, feeling the fabric. There were cheers around him and friendly hands ruffling his hair and clapping his shoulder.

Slowly ripping his head away from the binder, he lunged forward, causing Marlowe to yowl in surprise, and pulled the closest person into a hug, which was-

Mukuro tensed in his arms, but quickly relaxed when she realized what was going on. She hugged him back, patting his back. 

“I’m guessing you like it, Makoto?” He just whined happily into her jacket, not knowing how to convey how happy he was. Laughter burst from the people around them, the noise obviously loud enough to be heard by them. Makoto paid no mind to their laughter right now, just accepting that he had been funny for whatever reason. He was too caught up that his friends had gifted him  _ this _ .

  
  
  


Makoto felt tears welling up in his eyes again. He turned in the mirror, scrutinizing his chest as he rotated. The binder was comfortable, and…

He looked like a male.

Briskly wiping his eyes, he grabbed his normal outfit and shrugged it on. First his shirt, then his olive green hoodie, then the blazer.

Looking in the mirror yet again, a smile creased his face as he stared at himself. 

Quickly running a brush through his hair, he grabbed his backpack and left his room, sneaking through the house to the door. Toeing his red shoes on, he grabbed a notepad and wrote a note to his mom explaining that he’d left early for school. Grabbing his spare keys, he left the house and locked the door, ready to face the day as a male.

  
  


If all of his classmates except Hifumi, Byakuya, Toko, and Kyoko, as a collective whole, screamed upon seeing him and tackled him into a hug pile in the hallway of the school, that was no one’s business but theirs.


	2. Chapter 2

**_Hope’s Peak’s Mistake Class_ **

e g g o: guys i have someone I want u to meet!

leggo: 1 who changed my nickname and 2 who

Encyclopedia Brown: Whoever’s making the ship happen I applaud you

e g g o: ...wat

leggo: mcsqueeze me

Ah, Yes, B o o k: fckfscnkfscgwfnkgfnj

Insane Gemstone: I think the **** not

Homer Simpson: I don’t think Naegami’s gonna sail guys

Homer Simpson: woah name change

Kiyotaka Ishimaru: What is ‘Naegami’?

Homer Simpson: You don't need to know :)

blooberry: ...i ship it

Ah, Yes, B o o k: can you noT

e g g o: ...wait

e g g o: WAIT NO OMYGOSH   


e g g o: NONONONONONONONO

e g g o: also completely off-topic can I add that person in

Homer Simpson: Sure!

**_e g g o has added ????? to the chat_ **

?????: Makoto

?????: What is this

e g g o: my frens!

?????: Do they know abt me

e g g o: ….no

?????: *inhales*

?????: i told you Makoto

e g g o: i dont want them to reject you immediately like your class did!

Master Oogway: ...Whose class rejected who and who do I have to fight

?????: wait wat

Homer Simpson: aw, that sucks!

Homer Simpson: Hey new dude, do we have to knock some sense into your classmates????

?????: what is happening

Insane Gemstone: I will fight anyone who rejected someone for no reason

?????: /whisper e g g o/ they don’t know abt my dementia, do they

e g g o: whisper was disabled on this chat Koko

?????: ...crud

Homer Simpson: first off

**_Homer Simpson has changed ?????’s nickname to KoKoNut_ **

KoKoNut: what

Homer Simpson: Second

Homer Simpson: is there anything that’ll help your dementia?? like supplies and stuffs?

KoKoNut: ...the only true help is my meds and h a h a i can’t have those but stim toys help a bit

e g g o: wait

e g g o: wait why cant u has meds

KoKoNut:

**_KoKoNut has muted themself_ **

blooberry: ...wat just happened

Master Oogway:

Homer Simpson: The coconut nut is a giant nut

Worst Fanfic Writer Ever: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

_**Gremlin has kicked Worst Fanfic Writer Ever from the chat** _

Gremlin: no

**_GET HINATA A DATE CHALLENGE_ **

Hajimeme: GUYS HOW DO I ASK GUYS OUT THIS IS SERIOUS THIS TIME

fOrTnItE: ‘this time’

GuitareHeroine: ‘this time’

countrycrock: ‘this time’

Hajimeme: literally die

Hajimeme: BUT IM SERIOUS I NEED TO KNOW HOW TO ASK A DUDE OUT

flipflop: Hinata how can we help w/o knowing who your crush is

Tonky Stork: i bet its someone like Komaeda or smth

fOrTnItE: we all know you have a stupid yandere crush on Komaeda shut up Kaz

Tonky Stork: A T T A C K E D

flipflop: OHOOOOOOO

**_Hajimeme has deleted a message_ **

fOrTnItE: WAIT WHAT DID IT SAY   


GuitareHeroine: DID IT TELL US WHO HIS CRUSH WAS

Hajimeme: YOU HAVE NO PROOF

Hajimeme: JUST HELP MEEEEEEE   


countrycrock: roses are red, violets are blue

countrycrock: guess what, my bed has room for two 

flipflop: *chokes on tea*

fOrTnItE: Y E S

Hajimeme:  _ OH MY GOSH N O _

GuitareHeroine: Twinkle twinkle little star

GuitareHeroine: We can do it in a car

flipflop: *chokes on tea again*

Hajimeme:  **_ST O P_ **

Boss Baby: what

Boss Baby: They’re just helping

PhotographicMemory: row row row your boat gently down the stream

MonsterMash: merrily merrily merrily merrily i can make you scream

Hajimeme: i-

Hajimeme: wh a t 

MonsterMash: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Sofia the First: i feel like that last one is verging dangerously into serial killer territory

Hajimeme: komaeda would love that one tbh

MonsterMash: HOLUP

**_Hajimeme has deleted a message_ **

MonsterMash: NO WAIT I GOT RECEIPTS

Hajimeme: wh a T

MonsterMash: [RECEIPTS.jpg]

Hajimeme:  _ LITERALLY  _ **_D I E_ **

MonsterMash: no thx luv

PhotographicMemory: <:<

MonsterMash: you’re the only one for me bb

PhotographicMemory: :D

flipflop: gay

shotshotshotshots: Akane we’ve been dating for-

What a Mad Banquet of Darkness: as the token straight relationship

Sofia the First: Gundham dear

What a Mad Banquet of Darkness: Yes Queen of Darkness

Hajimeme: 

Hajimeme: yall just driving in how single I am

Boss Baby: u got this one babe

GoGo: stop whining

GoGo: woman up

Hajimeme: that is

Hajimeme: oddly inspiring thank u

GoGo: i live to please   


Boss Baby: hey peko shut the **** up you’re so much more than that

GoGo: ...i am sobbing brb

Hajimeme: GUYS SERIOUSLY HOW DO I ASK HIM OUT

Tonky Stork: wait who again

MonsterMash: >:}

Hajimeme: PLEASE DONT I WANT TO L I V E 

MonsterMash: He has a crush on Komaeda

Tonky Stork: ...m8 move the **** away from my man

Hajimeme: YOU BASICALLY VERBALLY ABUSE HIM WHENEVER YOU SEE HIM I DONT THINK HES YOURS KAZ   


flipflop: the tea is boiling

fOrTnItE: well nice knowing yall

Tonky Stork: IM EMOTIONALLY CONSTIPATED YOU KNOW THIS YOU KNOW I LOVE HIM SO BACK T* OFF

Hajimeme: WE’RE GEN Z WE’RE ALL EMOTIONALLY CONSTIPATED THIS ARGUMENT HAS NO BACKING   


Sofia the First: ...im scared

What a Mad Banquet of Darkness: I will protect you my queen

Sofia the First: Aw, Gun!

PhotographicMemory: ew

Sofia the First: literally die

Tonky Stork: OK M8 I WILL THROW HANDS 

Hajimeme: YOU WANNA ****ING GO

Tonky Stork: HE** YEAH

Hajimeme: MEET ME AT THE BASEBALL PITCH IN 5

Hajimeme: CHIAKI BE OUR WITNESS   


fOrTnItE: please don’t kill me

Tonky Stork: YOU'RE ON HAJIME

Hajimeme: BITE ME 

Tonky Stork: IS THAT A CHALLENGE

fOrTnItE: B O Y S

Hajimeme: sorry mom

Tonky Stork: sorry Chiaki

  
  


fOrTnItE: okay I told them no weapons and Kazuichi just pulls like 40 various weapons from his person

fOrTnItE: where did this man hide a chainsaw

flipflop: mcsqueeze

fOrTnItE: why does he have a pistol

fOrTnItE: thats illegal

MonsterMash: so is having a chainsaw

fOrTnItE: im not worried abt that rn

countrycrock: i am Concerned

flipflop: HAJIME WIN FOR KOMAEDA

shotshotshotshots: babe both of their motivation is Komaeda

fOrTnItE: DSKGFJKFDGFOL WHEN DID MS USAMI GET HERE

fOrTnItE: SHES SO MAD WT*

Boss Baby: MS USAMI???????? ANGRY?????????

PhotographicMemory: PICS OR IT DIDNT HAPPEN

fOrTnItE: [IAMTERRIFIED.jpg]

countrycrock: HONO

flipflop: With one picture every bone in my body has been primed to flight mode

GuitareHeroine: i will write an epic ballad for whoever dies at her hand

fOrTnItE: She’s on the phone w someone and currently screaming

fOrTnItE: both Hinata and Kaz have fled, there is a pile of weapons on the baseball pitch and Ms. Usami is mad

fOrTnItE: it is a day of cryptids

Hajimeme: YOURE ON YOUR OWN CHIAKI

Tonky Stork: HASTA LA BYE BYE

fOrTnItE: YOU T R A I T O R S

  
  
  


**_Hope’s Peak’s Mistake Class_ **

e g g o: hey KoKo where are u???

e g g o: you weren’t at the fountain today!

**_KoKoNut has been unmuted_ **

KoKoNut: Currently in the care of CPS so uuuuuhhh i wont be at the fountain for a bit

**_KoKoNut has muted themselves_ **

Homer Simpson: well thats not ideal

Insane Gemstones: thats bad

Ah, Yes, B o o k: a series of unfortunate events

e g g o: a bad time

Master Oogway: an inconvenient way to measure the passing of time

Celestial Seasonings: a crummy juncture

blooberry: a not so friendly experience

11037:  hey there buddy chum pal friend buddy pal chum bud friend fella bruther amigo pal buddy friend chummy chum chum pal i don't mean to be rude my friend pal home slice bread slice dawg but i gotta warn ya if u take one more diddly darn step right there im going to have to diddly darn snap ur neck and wowza wouldn't that be a crummy juncture, huh? do you want that? do wish upon yourself to come into physical experience with a crummy juncture? because friend buddy chum friend chum pally pal chum friend if you keep this up well gosh diddly darn i just might have to get not so friendly with u my friendly friend friend pal friend buddy chum pally friend chum buddy

e g g o: ...how did it become this

e g g o: also Leon how did you type that out that fast

11037: power of the aromantic

e g g o: ...fair

  
  
  
  


**_GET HINATA A DATE CHALLENGE_ **

Hajimeme: guys Komaeda wasn’t in school today

Hajimeme: Kazuichi i swear if you have smth to do w this

Tonky Stork: i wish lol

fOrTnItE: is this why we’re being lumped in w class 78 rn???

flipflop: Excuse me I’ll be praying that their Lucky student isn’t actually literally insane

shotshotshotshots: oh crud she’s hot

flipflop: Blondie??

shotshotshotshots: ye a h

flipflop: gay

shotshotshotshots: Akane

flipflop: I mean shes literally smoking so

Hajimeme: i smell an ot3 on the horizon

GuitareHeroine: speaking of OT3s!

GuitareHeroine: does anyone else see the chemistry between the brown-haired twink, the class rep, and the buff biker dude w a baguette on his head?

Sofia the First: I thought it was a corncob????

GuitareHeroine: 3:<

Sofia the First:

Sofia the First: words cannot describe how much I hate that face

GuitareHeroine: :3c

fOrTnItE: im calling it the twink, rep, and biker are dating

GoGo: *gasp*

GoGo: Makoto has

GoGo:  _ a soft ahoge _

MonsterMash: *gasp*

PhotographicMemory: SO HIS HAIR WONT STAB US WHEN WE PAT HIS HEAD

Hajimeme: i feel attacked

PhotographicMemory: oh,,,,, oh my  _ gosh,,,,, _

PhotographicMemory:

Hajimeme: ...he’s adorable oh no

GuitareHeroine: He’s sane too!

MonsterMash: Im calling it his talent is gonna be smth insane like Ultimate Babyface or Ultimate Actor bc his face is too cute to not be on the big screen

Hajimeme: ,,,,guys

Hajimeme: that’s the Lucky Student

flipflop: literally h o w

Hajimeme: ...srsly where is Komaeda?

Hajimeme: He’s never been late b4

fOrTnItE: Chill Hinata, he’ll be good

Sofia the First: I found [Komahina in a nutshell](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NpRwePeZo_8&list=PL5NG2eg5ephn1ajUWluDQ-MsF5pEq0iTM&index=9)

Hajimeme:

Hajimeme: who’s who

fOrTnItE: Komaeda’s obv Jean valJean

fOrTnItE: he’s not mentally stable enough to be Javert

Hajimeme: don’t insult Komaeda

fOrTnItE: I will do what I want

Hajimeme: ok mom

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> someone asked for more  
> so i wrote more :}  
> Comment if you liked this chapter and want to see more of this story! If I get enough comments, I may consider making this my next full-length fic! (it is surprisingly fun to write for the Danganronpa cast lol)  
> See yall next chapter, you beautiful kiwis!


	3. Chapter 3

**_DM between Komaeda Nagito and Hajime Hinata_ **

Hajime Hinata: Yo, Ko, are you okay? Why are you out of class?

Komaeda Nagito: I’m in foster care

Hajime Hinata:

Hajime Hinata: wait

Hajime Hinata: wait is this new or?

Komaeda Nagito: ??? you didnt know abt the plane accident like two years ago?

Hajime Hinata: _what accident_

Komaeda Nagito: The plane was hit by a meteor

Komaeda Nagito: i was the only survivor

Hajime Hinata: jeEz

Komaeda Nagito: yeAh

Komaeda Nagito: I have a screencap of the news thingie

Komaeda Nagito:

Hajime Hinata: can,,,,, can i just hug the baby you to death,,,,,,,

Komaeda Nagito: i mean if you find a way

Komaeda Nagito: Well we were only traveling bc of my lymphoma so

Hajime Hinata: 

Hajime Hinata: mcsqueeze

Komaeda Nagito: ?

Komaeda Nagito: my lymphoma???

Komaeda Nagito: At first my parents thought the pain could be bc of the dementia but when we got tested that wasn’t the case

Hajime Hinata: **_M c S q u e e z e_ **

Hajime Hinata: So,,,,, why didn’t you tell any of us?

Komaeda Nagito: You already didn’t accept me

Komaeda Nagito: If you knew I was mentally ill and slated to die in less than a year that would only be worse

Hajime Hinata: waitwait _wait_ **_wait_ **

Hajime Hinata: less than a **year**

Komaeda Nagito: Yup

Komaeda Nagito: I would have longer, but my aunt doesn’t believe in hospitals and she only lets me have meds for my lymphoma

Komaeda Nagito: ,,,sorry for acting weird all the time by the way, I’m not on meds for my dementia and it’s hard to deal w without the meds

Hajime Hinata: No no no no

Hajime Hinata: But

Hajime Hinata: I wouldn’t have left you, Komaeda

Hajime Hinata: Listen you’re an amazing person. You have flaws, but what human doesn’t?

Komaeda Nagito: you?

Hajime Hinata: what?

Komaeda Nagito: You’re perfect, dont u know? You have an amazing personality and you’re friendly and you’re loved by the class, unlike me

Komaeda Nagito: In my eyes, youre perfect

Hajime Hinata:

Hajime Hinata: Thanks, Ko

Hajime Hinata: But

Hajime Hinata: listen up I will make a PowerPoint on why you’re so amazing and it will be like a thousand slides long

Hajime Hinata: but that’ll take a little while so just trust me, okay? Trust me when I say you’re an amazing person

Komaeda Nagito: ….

Komaeda Nagito: I’ll try

Hajime Hinata: That’s all I ask of you, love

Komaeda Nagito: love?

Hajime Hinata: 

Hajime Hinata: i didnt mean to send that i am so sorry-

Komaeda Nagito: No no no no

Komaeda Nagito: I 

Komaeda Nagito: I kinda like it

Hajime Hinata: oh

Hajime Hinata: uh good

Komaeda Nagito: yea

  
  


**_GET HINATA A DATE CHALLENGE_ ** **_  
_**

Hajimeme: G UVYSH

Hajime Hinata: @everyone GET YOUR B U T T S ON WE HAVE TO T A L K

MonsterMash: what’s on the gaygenda today

Hajimeme: [screenshots.file]

MonsterMash:

MonsterMash: o h

Hajimeme: Yeah o h

flipflop: ,,,,,,,,,,,well then

Hajimeme: So

Hajimeme: How are we going to help him

fOrTnItE: are we not talking about the awkwardly gay moment in that last one

Hajimeme: yes shush

fOrTnItE: i

fOrTnItE: okay then

Sofia the First: I can do some research real quick, and pay if we have to buy anything!

PhotographicMemory: Sonia you _angle_

PhotographicMemory: wait

MonsterMash:

Sofia the First: r/thanksihateit


	4. Chapter 4

**_GET HINATA A DATE CHALLENGE_ ** **_  
_ **

Sofia the First: So… what are we going to do for Komaeda?

PhotographicMemory: I’m doing some research, and it looks like frontotemporal dementia is also a terminal illness

PhotographicMemory: But the progress can be slowed down by physical activity, a healthy diet, mental activity, and socializing

PhotographicMemory: This website recommends sorting, counting, and wrapping coins as an example

Hajimeme: I’m seeing stuff like baking and cooking, cleaning, arts and crafts, puzzles, but the one I think might be best is gardening

MonsterMash: Gardening?

Hajimeme: Think, we could grow our own fruits and veggies, and it’d help Komaeda with stimulating his brain

Hajimeme: There’s also a chance of him experiencing memory loss, and the garden might help him stave that off for a little while

MonsterMash: does Komaeda have a caregiver?

Hajimeme: We’d be his caregivers, we have to be

Hajimeme: He was just taken into CPS, his stable home is the dorms

Sofia the First: I could always convince Mrs. Usami to let us have a communal garden in that one area just under Komaeda’s window- it gets a lot of sun and is outside!

PhotographicMemory: and if that doesn’t work

flipflop:  _ we bribe her _

PhotographicMemory: ,,,I was gonna say we do it anyways but that works too

Hajimeme: Okay, I did some (more) research and found smth interesting

Hajimeme: Komaeda will have intense mood swings, and at some times he’ll seem like a totally different person

Hajimeme: As a way to help, we’ll have to treat him the same we always do/will, which could get hard

Hajimeme: Also apparently seizures can happen so that’s a thing

Sofia the First: Wow,,,,

Sofia the First: I feel bad for Komaeda now…

MonsterMash: But what abt the other thing he mentioned? The lymphoma I think???

Hajimeme: ...I almost forgot abt that

MonsterMash: Since it slipped y’all’s minds I did some research on it

MonsterMash: So if he has lymphoma, that means that he will have things like fevers, swollen lymph nodes, severe itchiness, unexplainable weight loss, trouble eating, etc.

Sofia the First: !! I bet those little lumps on his neck are his lymph nodes!

Hajimeme: Oh, they can get bigger

Sofia the First: mcsqueeze

Hajimeme: I had a lymph node infection once and they were huge

Hajimeme: It looked like I was a chipmunk with the mumps

Sofia the First:

Sofia the First: a h

MonsterMash: He needs a diet rich in fruits and vegetables, so another score for the community garden

Hajimeme: What type of lymphoma does he have??

flipflop: No clue~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

GuitareHeroine: The fabulous Ibuki can find out!

Hajimeme: While she finds that out, let’s look at more information about this

Hajimeme: Komaeda will have to go through chemotherapy

Tonky Stork: oh no, his beautiful hair-

Hajimeme: hands off my man

Tonky Stork: >:<>

flipflop: what even

flipflop: what even is that

Tonky Stork: angery bird

shotshotshotshots: I’ve helped someone with Hodgkins lymphoma before, so if he has that he should be completely fine!

GuitareHeroine: He has Burket’s I think??? is that how it’s spelled??

flipflop: ...you mean Burkitt’s

GuitareHeroine: !!! That’s the one

shotshotshotshots: ...yeah that’s bad

Hajimeme: ?   


Tubgami: Must I remind you of the rule I established

~~ Tonky Stork: what rule ~~

Tonky Stork: ?

**_Tonky Stork has deleted a message_ **

Tubgami: The one saying that if you sent just a question mark, it Will Not Be Tolerated

Tubgami:

Tubgami: I despise you, Kazuichi

Tonky Stork: ;D

Tubgami: Literally die

shotshotshotshots: Burkitt’s lymphoma is some of the most serious lymphoma. It’s deadly, and hard to cure. If Komaeda has enough chemoimmunotherapy, it’ll heal. But that would be intensive, and most likely harsh on him. Tack on the fact that he has FTD, and that would make it difficult for him. At this point, he'd have about six months of intensive chemotherapy with a high dosage of cytarabine. The good thing is that as soon as he starts getting treated, his lymphoma will get easier quickly. Burkitt’s is deadly if left untreated, but with the right treatment he’ll recover fairly quickly. And… I actually have a project Hope’s Peak assigned me that I can use Komaeda for. I’ve been paired with two people in class 76, the Ultimate Pharmacist and the Ultimate Psychopathologist, to study and create a (simulated) medicine for an obscure, untreated mental illness. If we get permission, and Komaeda’s consent, we could theoretically find a cure for FTD

Hajimeme: ,,,Mikan, I had no clue you’d be able to chat that much at once

shotshotshotshots: ..ohmygosh Im so sorry! Im sure a wall of text was annoying to read, i shouldn’t have sent it I’m so sorry

flipflop: Babe you’re fine, that was actually interesting!

Hajimeme: I thought that was interesting Mikan, don’t apologize!

MonsterMash: Wow, youre actually smart? I can’t believe it!   


Boss Baby: shut the **** up

MonsterMash: Jeez, so sensitive!

flipflop: I am the Lorax, I speak for Mikan and the trees

flipflop: Bully her again, I break your ****ing knees

MonsterMash: gEEZ


	5. Chapter 5

**_Hope’s Peak’s Mistake Class_ **

e g g o: Junko what the heck are you doing

garbage: SHUT UP P E A S A N T

Homer Simpson: Junko why are you standing on the counter

garbage: YOU DON'T NEED TO KNOW

Encyclopedia Brown: Junko, who are you today

garbage:

garbage: Joou

Encyclopedia Brown: Hi, Joou

e g g o: :o I haven’t met you yet! Hi!

garbage: Hello, subject!

blooberry: Is this a new personality?

garbage: Must I explain myself to you, subject?

blooberry: !!!!!! DXNDNSXFGDSJKNWGD I LOVE YOUR LITTLE CROWN ITS SO CUTE 

garbage:

garbage: The last time I fronted, no one liked it so I haven’t fronted for a while since

garbage: I saw how you treated that coconut dude, and thought that maybe you wouldn’t treat me badly

e g g o: aw Joou!

Encyclopedia Brown: Adding her to our list rn

Celestial Seasonings: where are we on the list, Kyoko?

Encyclopedia Brown: We have Chousei, Kuyo, Kureijii, Kochoi, Chousa, Suzushii, Airashii, and now Joou

Insane Diamonds: another one?

garbage: That’s ‘another queen’ to you, peasant!

Insane Diamond:

Insane Diamond:  _ We gonna have a problem, chick? _

garbage: Chick? I am your queen, and you will refer to me as such!

Psychic: That’s a good system so far, do you have any other personalities that we should watch out for?

garbage: Junko has two littles, and I believe she has anywhere between two and five more grown personalities

Encyclopedia Brown: That’s a nice system

garbage: Sincere thanks, my subject!

Insane Diamond: Hey, why is she a subject while I’m a peasant?

garbage: Your first reaction to me was ‘another one?’, which is extremely disrespectful to someone of my status

garbage: You were demoted before I ever met you

Insane Diamond: Hey, chick, shut the **** up

Hall Monitor: Mondo, calm down! Hello, Joou, it’s nice to meet you!

Encyclopedia Brown: and the boyfriend saves the day once again

e g g o: 

e g g o: yep!

blooberry: Makoto? You okay?

e g g o: yeah! Why wouldn’t I be?

Insane Diamond: tch, if he says he’s okay he’s okay

Hall Monitor: To be sure, I will check on him! Makoto, where are you?

e g g o: I’m on the track field

Hall Monitor: Thank you! Mondo, come with me

Encyclopedia Brown:

Encyclopedia Brown: and why would Mondo come with you, if he’s so sure Makoto’s okay?

Hall Monitor: I don’t trust him to not kill Joou without me

blooberry: RKJSGRWDGKJRWGDFSKJRGSDZ<MRGDSKJRN

Celestial Seasonings: oh my-

Homer Simpson: SHOTS F I R E D

Psychic: HELLO 911 WE JUST WATCHED A MURDER


End file.
